I decided to take myself out on a date. It was so romantic. I took myself to Oak Grove Park. (Or at least that’s what me and my husband re-named it!)
I figured a picnic would be fancy enough, but not too fancy. I didn’t bring a sheet. Or a basket. Or a bottle of wine. (Like I said, not too fancy!) 🙂 Simple is best, and that’s just the way I like it.
Beneath a tall oak tree, I watched children play. And laugh. I laughed with them. Then I just sat there quietly and ate.
Salad. Water. Just sat. With myself. Pondering about life. Pondering about all sorts of things.
Doing anything alone always frightened me for some reason. I don’t know what I feared exactly, but all I knew was that I didn’t like even the thought of doing anything alone.
I always lived by the motto: “The more the merrier!” And that’s the way I lived my life for years. Any time I’d go somewhere, I’d try to invite as many people as possible.
It doesn’t sound all that appealing anymore. I think now: “The more, the messier!” And that’s generally true in most cases. More drama. More gossip. More waste. More clean-up. Over the years, after trying things out for myself, & being alone more often, you could say I’ve learned a few things. And I’d be glad to share them with you today:
Lesson #1: I’ve come to learn more about myself and who I really am.
This is something that happens on the inside (like deep down.) I’ve learned more of the things I really enjoy. Things I really don’t enjoy. Things that surprise me. For instance, I learned that when I sit beside a big oak tree, in the afternoon sun, during the springtime, with my shoes off, close my eyes, I feel connected with the earth. I feel calm and centered. I feel at peace. I never could’ve learned about myself if I hadn’t been truly present. In the moment. Just me and nature.
Lesson #2: I enjoy myself more.
I always thought I’d feel lonely, scared, and bored with my thoughts. But the opposite is more true. I became more joyful, and giddy, and playful. I felt like a kid again. I could use my imagination. I found my imaginary friend again. Me.
When I’m by myself, I don’t have to look to others for approval. Approval of where ‘we’ go. What ‘we’ will do. Whatever I want, goes. And that’s just the way I like it.
Lesson #3: I learned how to become my best friend.
I started noticing nice things about myself. I started noticing my thoughts, and how they reach out to others. I started to respect myself and think highly of myself. Not in the sense of bragging, but more like I was realizing who I really was inside and taking note. Kind of like I would another person. I started more positive self-talk, and talking to myself like I would a friend. I’d say things like: “Nice outfit you got there,” or “You’re so funny,” or “I love the way you laugh.” Life is more fun when you’re not being your worst enemy. I’m pretty sure I literally hugged myself at some point. And, (I’ll admit) it was actually quite nice!
I mean, after all, we will be with us the rest of our lives, so we better get a start on liking ourselves a bit!
My challenge for you is this: Go do something solo today. Go to lunch, on a walk, or treat yourself to a fancy lattè. Breathe it all in. Truly experience it.
Tell yourself all the things you would a ‘real’ best friend. Tell yourself how adorable or handsome you look. Tell yourself that you’re so glad you get to spend time with them. Tell yourself that there’s no one who could ever replace you. Give yourself a hug (literally, hug yourself!) and tell yourself that you’re so glad they could make it out today. Thank yourself for being perfectly on time.
And most importantly, tell yourself “I love you.” And mean it.
I love you. I truly do. Thanks for reading. Thanks for stopping by. I hope you’ve gained something 🙂
Peace & Love my friends,