An apology letter to the world:
This letter was inspired from the feedback I got from sending emails to people that are close to me and that really know me. I sent out an email asking what my weaknesses and less strong points in life are, and got some amazing feedback.
Thank you to those who were involved! You are the greatest.
This letter goes out to all my friends, coworkers, colleagues, ex-boyfriends, acquaintances, and people I’ve never met yet. This is for all those times when I was a bear to be around, or someone you couldn’t trust.
This letter is to you.
I would like to formally apologize if I have ever, in the history of my life EVER offended you, hurt your feelings (intentionally OR unintentionally), or made negative & judgmental comments about you or anyone else.
I apologize for all the times I’ve been in my “extreme behavior modes,” where I was so extremely passionate about something that I got all up in your face about it, causing you to feel uncomfortable or awkward.
I’m sorry for all the times that I was so depressed and down on myself that I wasn’t there for you emotionally and spiritually.
I apologize for talking bad behind your back or for cursing you out during my crazy teenage years.
I’m sorry for being so selfish at times. For throwing ‘fits’ when I don’t get what I wanted. For expecting that everyone should do things MY WAY.
I’m sorry for all the times I tried to control and manipulate you into doing something you didn’t want to do or being someone you didn’t want to be.
I’m sorry for lying to you.
I’m sorry for cheating on you, kissing another guy when I was supposed to be with you.
I’m sorry for driving angry and yelling because I was so mad. For being crazy on the road, almost causing an accident.
I’m sorry for bossing you around, & telling you what to do.
I’m sorry for being so crabby when I’m tired. Or hungry.
I’m sorry for being resentful over things that happened SO long ago.
I’m sorry that I lose my patience with you, I want to be gentle, and loving and kind (even when situations don’t go as expected.)
I’m sorry that I had such high expectations of you that I nit-picked your life and made you feel like you weren’t good enough. You ARE good enough. You are MORE than enough.
I’m sorry for the times that I read into things too much and interpret things the way you don’t intend for me to. For distorting the truth along the way because of my insecurities or pre-judgements about you and your personality.
I’m sorry for ASSUMING. A lot. I understand that I don’t know, unless I know. I guess I just think I’m smart enough to come to those conclusions on my own. And I’m wrong. A lot.
I’m sorry for not admitting that I’m wrong.
I’m sorry for being so insecure. For lacking confidence when I know I’m better than that.
I’m sorry for not caring about how you feel sometimes, for caring more about my feelings, how I feel, and what I need.
I’m sorry for not being as generous as I want to be deep down.
I’m sorry for smothering you.
I’m sorry for not being a great friend sometimes, for not checking up on you as much as I want to and know I need to.
I’m sorry for not talking to you for 2 years. You are an AMAZING friend. It was just really hard for me. I know you understand, but I just wanted to tell you that I’m sorry. I know it hurt you.
I’m sorry for not standing up for you. I wanted to but I was too scared.
I’m sorry for allowing fear to keep me from doing amazing things. From trusting you with my whole heart. Getting hurt hurts.
I’m sorry for stealing your money. I knew it was wrong, but I felt like I deserved it. I rationalized it with that clever mind of mine, but I really regret doing that. I learned my lesson though, and I haven’t taken anything that wasn’t mine since that day.
I’m sorry for not being genuine. For not having integrity.
I’m just sorry for it all.
If I could take it all back, I would. But it’s impossible, so I can’t. I can’t take away your pain. I can’t take back the words that I said, or the mean looks I gave.
But there is one thing I can do— And that is: I can do better from this day forward.
Every day we are forced to make choices. To make decisions.
And sometimes we make the right ones, and other times we don’t.
Sometimes we’re less careful, less cautious.
We hurt the people we love most.
There’s freedom in that though. We can learn from all of it!
That’s what we do: Learn from the tough stuff, learn from the great stuff, and then do the best we can with what we’ve got.
I hope this letter can serve as an inspiration for us all to do better. To give more. To be more.
To try to improve at least 1% each day.
That way, we can be 360% better in one year. Now THAT’S exciting!
What would our world look like if we all just tried to make our lives and the lives of others better?
Perhaps our world would become a more positive & encouraging place. People helping people.
And now I’d like to thank you.
Thank you for still being my friend.
Thank you for still believing in me.
Thank you for your forgiveness and for your kindness.
But most of all, thank you for your love.
Without you, my life just wouldn’t be the same.
So, thank you for being a part of my life.
Thank you for sticking by my side, even when I’m not my best self at times.
Thank you for being you.
I love you.
Thank you so much for reading my words. Feel free to comment, sharing your opinions or what comes up for you. Talk to you soon!
With super-charged gratitude, grace, and inner peace,